I would like to share a new project that I am experimenting with - The Gratitude Project. Roger and I have discovered the power of gratitude in our lives. Not just in the small and everyday ways but in the 'stop and really take notice' ways.
I suggested that for the next ten days we write down ten things we are grateful for about each other and our relationship. Then we sit opposite each other, and with one person listening and receiving the other shares what they have written.... and then swap over. Well we cannot stop... it has grown like wildfire. Last night I read out three pages of thank you's to him! And the lists are filling books! It opens our hearts in a magical way.
So, even if you are having a great time with your loved ones around you, but particularly if you have someone who challenges you at present, I would like to extend an invitation to you... maybe its your partner, or your child, or your mother or father... and make a commitment to do it for ten days. Write down ten things you love and appreciate about them. If you get stuck you can repeat the thank you's if need be, however you may be surprised at how much you find.
This is not to gloss over the negatives and do a Pollyanna, everything is rosy approach. However, it is about creating pathways for change. It is changing our paradigm from a half empty glass approach to one that sees the glass is half full... in fact, our cup is overflowing...I believe that with a good dose of positive affirming behaviour we can better approach the challenges and speak our needs in a healthier relationship environment. That's my direct experience.
Roger and I enjoy giving thanks every day for what we share. It's not always love, peace and happiness, and sometimes it can take me a minute or two or three to smile. However it is rich, honest and ever changing, and this exercise has been a great recipe in our relationship diet.
I encourage you to take up the opportunity and I would love to hear how you go with it!
Having conducted over 1,000 ceremonies, Wendy put her experiences into writing and is the author of 7 popular "do it yourself" books.
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