Condolence Letters of Love and Care

Condolence Letters of Care and Love

Oftentimes, people are unsure of what to say to those who have experienced the death of someone very close to them.

Carol, whose husband died unexpectedly, shared these two ‘love notes’ from neighbours that expressed to her a sense of connection, care and that she was being held close in this time.

The first is a drawing of a person climbing a ladder to change a lightbulb with the handwritten note, ‘This is a nontransferable voucher for light bulb changes from Toby and his team of apprentice sparkies.’

It was written by the young son of one of the neighbours offering his dad and their family as helpers – and included their phone number which I have edited from the image in case you were thinking of calling!

The next one was written by an elderly gentleman who was also widowed and knew the pain of separation from someone you love dearly.

Your arrangements for David’s service were quite superb, and very much had a great family feeling. Right now, 4pm, I am still experiencing admiration for the way you all made a superb individual contribution. Remarkable! I thought the venue served you and your guests very well.

My friend and I attended together, and he has arranged with your son-in-law to have a recording, which will please me greatly, because big families tell stories of wonder! And, of love.

I had been awake from about 2.30m off and on, thinking of you and your welfare. I’ve done that a bit over the years. I admired your composure in these circumstances, and before so many people in a  moving throng. Somehow, I have developed a way of handling distress in most of its forms, largely due to my work experience. I’ve had personal experience in Jane*-less times.

With your approval, I’ll keep in close contact, and you can call in should you need some help. I’ll give you some breathing space for a while now, but don’t let it stop you, you have this large family, living locally, they will revel in the job of looking after you. I’m not wanting to usurp their positions, but I am here if you think I can be of help.

Just the warmest wishes and understanding.
Sincerely yours,

*Jane was his deceased wife. The name has been changed for anonymity.

Carol, said it was lovely just to know that people were thinking of her. Maybe there is a letter you would like to write to a friend, neighbour or colleague that has been grieving.

Letting people know we care can uplift a spirit that may be feeling at a loss and alone.

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2 years ago

Dear Wendy, I am touched by the two very different ways of sharing condolence. I feel such laughter and sorrow looking at the drawing. The feeling lingers of what is said and unsaid.
Honoring this. Sorrow and love.
May we all be held.