Tears, Grief and Forgiveness

The sky is a mass of pink cotton-balls as the evening closes in—the lorikeets have gone their way and there is a solitary bird singing just outside my window. I sit here in my lounge room as the chill sets in and I wrap my scarf around my neck.

I’ve just had a talk with Parul, a dear Indian friend who I met by Grace here in Coffs Harbour. He is making his way to New York on Thursday for work. For the last few years, Parul, my partner and I have been coming together monthly for a silent retreat in our home. A time for meditation, satsang, chanting, contemplation and ‘inner silence’.

This last weekend however, my partner wanted to open up some time for talking so he could connect with Parul as it is likely we won’t see him for a while. I asked him what this might look like—he replied, We will be silent until we talk. We all laughed. The rhythm of our time together flowed beautifully. That inner silence was present even when we were talking.

This afternoon, I asked Parul if we could do an informal ‘interview’ on his views on tears, grief and forgiveness. I am writing a series of poems for the new version of the Death and Dying program.

I’ll include a few gems from this lovely being—Parul Punjabi.

We are all born crying… a flood of tears, even if its a joyful occasion!

Tears are a like a raincloud building, at some point you have to let go… it serves a purgatory purpose….if you are stuck and you don’t know what to do, tears are the solution!

Here’s to tears and crying.  I do appreciate a good cry. I’ll write up some thoughts on Forgiveness in my next blog.

Please leave your thoughts… either on the post or, what are your thoughts about tears? Crying?


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2 years ago

Love “We are all born crying” Wendy – letting tears bookend our arrival and departure. Thank you for sharing. I’m also very glad to read that your health is improving so much. Warmest regards Bonnie x

2 years ago

Crying is a great release for me. I usually cry alone but I feel very loved when I feel I can cry in front of someone else and feel their empathy. I hope I can help my children know it’s ok and good to cry. Thanks for sharing Wendy. ❤️

2 years ago

Thank you for sharing Crying and tears are like a cleansing for me. Used to be teased that my bladder and tear ducts are connected.