Brad lived at home with his mum and dad for most of his 39 years. It was a huge shock when he died unexpectedly. Meeting with them at their home in the tender place of grief and the sharp space of disbelief, they told of their love and joy of having him always close, and I gathered a few stories; but they didn’t have many connections from his life outside the home.
I watched the beautiful comments appear on Brad’s funeral notice that was posted on the funeral directors Facebook page and I reached out to many of the young folk leaving tributes and asked if they would write and tell me some more. They were so kind and responsive and I got permission to include their words in the ceremony. It moved Brad’s parents deeply to hear these stories. As part of the eulogy, I included the following:
An old school friend, Joanne, told me, ‘I always remember his smiling face and infectious laugh. A genuine, caring soul, always up for a chat. Even 20 odd years later, running into him in the street, it was just like the old high school days—so familiar and comforting. He had a special light about him. There are people in this world that leave a mark no matter how big or small. For no other reason than being the guy that never had a bad word to say about anybody. The guy that would give his own shirt, if you needed it. The guy that could restore your belief in humankind, just by spending a minute with him.’
There were other stories and quotes I gleaned from the comments.
(Please do write love messages and tells stories on Funeral Notice posts, they are so helpful!)
Excerpt from the closing words…
Brad had a deep respect for the natural world and a love of music. Classical, jazz, blues…music that had rhythm, resonance, movement, silence. Now, the silence that remains after his death, is painful for his parents to bear. Grief is a response to a deep love, and for Brad’s parents, he was the centre of their universe and for now, they feel like they have been cast into a refrain that is discordant beyond belief.
Rest in peace dear Brad.